before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
