You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
3pm strippers are depressing
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
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