epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize