Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
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