We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
literally had 100 drinks last night.
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
