woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
