Well douche your snatch and let's go!
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
