Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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