Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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