i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
