It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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