i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Randomize