Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
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