Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Randomize
