If that was your dad, he is hot
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
