I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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