There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Randomize
