We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize