like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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