Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
