You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
