I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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