i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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