she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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