how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
