Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
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