i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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