my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Randomize
