are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize
