the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
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