Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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