What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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