R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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