Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
