Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
