I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
