i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
