But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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