i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
