Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Randomize
