every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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