I wish I could teleport
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
