Its about making memories worth repressing
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize
