hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Randomize
