ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
