dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Randomize
