Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Randomize
