We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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