Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
this will be a night to untag.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
