Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Randomize
