I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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